That will teach me to fill out a survey..

On my way to class, going to be late if I don't get there in 5 mins. I walk into the building and get bombarded by someone asking me if I want popcorn from her at a booth. I was kind of in a hurry and thinking, "popcorn would be nice as munchies in class" so I decided ok sure, why not? She tells me that before I can take it, I have to fill out a 1 minute survey.

I look at the survey and its about religion. Oh boy! This is going to be interesting. First of all, the survey took 30 seconds really so that was a plus. Second of all, the questions were quite personal, going from questions like: "When was the last time you went to Church?" and "Do you believe that Jesus ever existed?" These kind of questions are pretty personal to everyone and so even though I wasn't quite comfortable (considering she was watching me fill it out... making me feel very warm and on edge), I finished the survey, took my popcorn and left.

I got to class on time, that was pretty good. But one downside to filling out that survey (which I didn't even eat the popcorn, what a waste) was that I got a call from them asking me if I want to visit their booth and learn more about their program (Catholic Christian Outreach).

I thought to myself, "how bad could it be? Just go in, check it out before class, and get out!" Or so I thought.

I got a one on one talk with someone from the program and she convinced me (because I can never say no to people so that I don't hurt them) to go to "Faith Study". Seriously? Me? Faith study? Grrreeeaaaat!

So now I told her I would go, but she still hasn't called me to come. Good news for now, but what if she does call? I have to be in a discussion and talk about God and the bible.

I hope she doesnt call. It took me all the strength I possessed not to contradict her in the things she told me about God and the relationship we have with him.

Oh well, I guess we'll see what happens. I want to believe in something, but sometimes, it just doesn't happen. Its hard to believe in something that doesn't exist. I'm one of those... i know. :P

Honesty... its a tricky thing...

You know, after taking several classes in how to listen properly, how to formulate a proper apology and how to tell someone how you feel about them in a way that doesn't offend them, really opened my eyes to proper communication.

Even though I have this knowledge to back me up when something bothers me, not everything happens the way its supposed to.

Take for example today! I lost a close friend of mine. I've only known her for 3 and half years, but hey, we had a lot in common. I tell her one honest thing, she blasts me and has now deleted me on facebook. Wow, as if being deleted off Facebook these days means something real. Insane!

Anyway, its ridiculous how even after high school, people in their 20s still act like they're in their teens. Its disturbing and at the same time, its a waste of precious time and effort.

You know, friends come and go, so its no biggie, but sometimes its hard to let go those that affected you in a most profound way. The way she did, she was a great listener. but was horrible at actually understanding the most simplest of things which led to many fights.

Oh well, life is tough. You take what you can get and you figure out how to deal with it.

I lost a friend today, I'm one day closer to finding out what kind of person I want to share my secrets with and hang out and shop with.

Honesty is one tricky thing...

Life sucks

Well, I'm back for my quarterly blog. Yeah, I know, I don't write too much... Work and school will do that.

I'm just so bored right now. I wish I could be a good writer. Or have someone discover me as a great singer. Travel the world maybe... ARGH! I don't know what I want to do. Life just sucks. Its true, my life could be worse, I am certainly greatful to have a job, a family, money, friends, etc. Having no direction in life changes that perspective though a bit.

I don't know what to do. I hope that sometime soon, I can figure it out. I'm tired of not knowing.

confusion... why must we feel it?

So, I'm sure I'm not the only one around here feeling the same way. Why do we need to feel confused all the time? Why can't we be certain of something everytime? I want to be certain of what I'm going to do with my life, my career, etc. But I can't because I have to feel confused about it first.

How fun!

I'd love to be one of those people who know what they want to do in life. I'd love to say: "I want to be a doctor, or a lawyer. Now I just have to figure out how to reach that goal." Unfortunately, I'm the complete opposite: "What's my goal? What do I want to do? Where do I go? What do I like to do?" I HAVE NO CLUE!

Should it really be this hard? Its not like I was never involved in anything when I was younger. I took dancing lessons, music lessons, Jiu-Jitsu, took theater classes, participated in school carnivals, went camping, played baseball, went to see hockey all the time, travelled a lot with the family. I wasn't really deprived of anything that could broaden my horizons to an interesting career. I was brought up to be very open to any career.

Now here I am several years later, with no idea what to do. How can this even be possible? Too many possibilities? Too many choices? Was I not born with decision making capabilities?

I'm not in my second program of post-secondary education. Still no clue what I want to do. Hopefully one day, I can look back at what I really like to do, and work off of that in a drastic way to really open up my eyes to what I want to do.

Life! URGH!

An Activist or not an Activist? That is the question...

So I follow Perez Hilton as well as other sites for celebrity gossip for fun. No harm in that. One problem, a wannabe activist poser is interfering with the news and imposing beliefs on others.

I don't like hypocrites, who does really? But I just can't keep my mouth shut on this one. When you are pro- anything, thats great! when its not hurting anyone! When it starts to hurt someone or an entity either physically or mentally, thats when its not cool anymore.

Perez Hilton is gay. Okay, thats fine. No problem there. He makes big deals about things that shouldnt be a big thing when it comes to gay rights. Okay, problem.

Perez has 43 posts up to now on Miss California Carrie Prejean ranging from dates April 20, 2009 to May 20, 2009. He was one of the judges at the Miss America pageant where he asked Miss California the question: "What do you think about same-sex marriage legalization?". To that, she said in her family, the way she was brought up, she believes in a man and a woman being wed. She also said she had nothing against those who are gay, it was just the way she was brought up.

Okay, so honestly, this should have ended here. She has the right to her own opinion regardless of her title of Miss California. But Perez took it too far and actually made the media and those in the Pageant organization to question Miss California's title and if she should lose it because of her beliefs.

As usual, Perez usual irrelevant information to condemn Miss Prejean as a bad person. He goes on to talk about the semi-naked pictures she took before she was even Miss California. He also talks about her being abused as a child. When did this gay-rights situation even come to talking about abuse? Why does that even need to be talked about? Her decision to tell the world the truth about her beliefs in opposite-sex marriage has nothing to do with her being abused. I've taken psychology classes, and honestly, no connection. Its not the kind of information you give out to the public about someone who has only given respect to others.

But, just as usual, Perez doesn't stop there. He is now saying that Nigel Lythgoe from "So You Think You Can Dance" is homophobic. I actually watched that episode this week and nothing Nigel said was in any way homophobic.

This week's episode was the first of this new season and was a 2-hour auditions episode naturally. Well into the second hour, two men, one straight and one gay, came onto the stage and started dancing together. Even though when concentrating on the dance itself, they made several mistakes, two men dancing together can easily be defined as awkward, whether they are gay or straight.

Well, Perez overreacted and said that what Nigel said about them was homophobic. Nigel, as well as the other judges, not just Nigel, told both men that when they think of dancing, they think of a woman and a man.... Wait a second, did they say something bad about people who are gay? I think... I THINK Perez is confused. Not once did the judges talk about the sexual orientation of the men in question. They commented on two males dancing together and how it would be producing a malaise in the competition as it is not customary for two men to dance close proximity dances.

How in any way is this talking about their sexual orientation? As usual, this is overreaction from the Hilton camp. Not only did this become a problem for him, now the GLADD's (the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation) president Neil G. Giuliano commented on Nigel Lythgoe's comments on the show: "It’s unacceptable for this kind of blatant homophobia to occur. Fox Entertainment and Nigel Lythgoe owe Misha, Mitchel and the whole LGBT community an apology."

Really? Are you kidding me? I'm completely pro-gay rights and all, but this is getting ridiculous! Apparently the media and organizations don't know when is too much. When is being an activist going to far? When does taking things too seriously get annoying and frustrating? I think its when people take things way out of proportion and look for hidden meanings in comments that have nothing to do with the subject at hand.

Honestly, get over it guys, be for gay-rights all you want but don't start harrassing people and making stories up to get your way. Its just as worse is being against gay rights. Counter-productive!!!!

No worries

I am going to write something soon.. I've been so busy with exams at school... but no worries, I will definitely be writing something tomorrow!!

Updates soon!

hypocrisy...

just a little side note sort of reminding me of current personal events...

.. just wanted to say... don't you just hate hypocrites? I absolutely hate them! On my top 3 things that I hate the most for sure. You know, the type that will get all mad and argumentative with you and then just leaves things like that, with nothing resolved. Then, later on that day, the person is entirely okay with you even though you didnt even talk about what happened earlier that day? Like c'mon, we both know we aren't on good terms, why lie about it to my face? Ignore me, be mad at me, thats what you're supposed to do when you aren't happy with someone.. not just put a facade on and pretend like nothing happened. Sorry but you aren't someone I want to talk to right now unless its to resolve what just happened, and I don't want to talk to you even more if you're going to be such a hypocrite and pretend like nothing happened...

Don't you just hate people like that? Urgh! I do. Pisses the crap out of me!!!